Wait, you didn't make into NGADM? Or NGUAC? Not even AIM? It's not the end of the world. There is always more chances for you.
Where are you going to be hurry if you are not dying? Like I have leukemia, it ain't getting better, and I'm not even in a rush. Why are you so angsty toward fellow musicians?
People need to chill the fuck down. It's not the end of the world ya dummies. Let's sit down and have story time. There was dark days I didn't make it in any contest in a long time. And I didn't get pissed at the judges or people. I improve and improvise my shit. I make shit that no one thought about. And here I am, churning out best shit that people admire.
No one should be a sad, angry of jealous piece of shit. The whole point of finding the mistakes and fix the fuck out of it. To quote Elliot Alderson:
Most coders think debugging software is about fixing a mistake, but that’s bullshit. Debugging’s actually all about finding the bug, about understanding why the bug was there to begin with, about knowing that its existence was no accident. It came to you to deliver a message, like an unconscious bubble floating to the surface, popping with a revelation you’ve secretly known all along.
Also STOP THINKING about making music as a job, because you are gonna be a shithead who think of getting rich like useless Berklee frat fucks who think owning Pro Tools make their music better. Don't.
Write music for the sake of defining your life.
Don't be jealous of other, because if you do no one will give a shit about your angsty shit.
Instead, channel your energy into improving the things that matter.